Dante’s Opinion: Inappropriate Family Members
Well, we have a sensational problem put out here by Ann. Quite disturbing.
My fiance is from Australia.His family lives there. I had never met any of them before the holidays. But my Fiance decided that since we got engaged in Sept it was time I met them. He got a really good bonus so he helped pay for his parents and his sister and 2 brothers to come to Texas to meet my family and me. It was going good. But Christmas eve came around and we had a get together at my moms house. Liquor was involved and I went outside to get some fresh air and my fiances dad came out to smoke a cig. We started talking and he started telling me how pretty I was and I thought it was nice and the next thing I knew he was like rubbing his hands on my boobs. I said stop and moved away and he said “Sorry just drunk” I kind of just let that go. A few days later that weekend we had another get together and they were all drinking again but we were at my house. I was up in my room to use the bathroom and I walk out and his brother was in my room laying on my bed almost passed out and I just let him stay there and was quietly walking out when he said my name. I turned around and he had his penis out and was like you know you got the wrong brother. I got a bigger one for you.I told him to put in back in his pants before I cut in off. But I still didn’t say anything to my fiance. They are back in Australia but it is still bothering me, was this some kind of test or were they being that nasty? Should I tell my fiance? Also, they are taking about coming back for the parents 30 year wedding anniversary in June. If this is the way they act I do not want them here. I have to tell my fiance that as well.
You have to tell him. Tell your fiance. Here’s the thing…you’ll likely have to deal with this all of the time. You want to build a family with this guy? He’ll want his side of the family to be a part of his kids’ lives.
Even looking into the immediate future, this is wildly inappropriate and this has to be brought to light. If your fiance stands by you, you know you got somebody that is standing with you. If he tries to defend their behavior, you may really have to reconsider who you are marrying.
My whole thing is, this is sexual harassment. Like, you could seriously take legal action here. So, like, you need to speak up. For your sake. For you. Your well being. Your peace of mind. You must.
And no; I’m not taking drinking as an excuse. I refuse. I just won’t. I have personally seen what happens when people drink. People falling in the street; busting their heads open. Abuse towards others. All kinds of “that’s not like him/her”. Nope. I won’t entertain it.
Also, is your fiance the same way? Has he been drunk? What does he act like? What will he act like? Shucks, were they really drunk? This might be them sober too! You need to speak up and figure this out before you walk down the aisle.